What’s In A Name?

 

I can tell you that for me, it’s a lot. Your identity, reputation, and legacy bear your name. Today, I’m excited to tell you all that my name is Lisa Marie Marcellino! I made the decision to go back to my maiden name and as of August 3, 2022, the judge made it official!

Four years ago, when I was finalizing my divorce, my attorney asked me if I wanted to return to my maiden name. I did not hesitate for a minute…”No! I’ve been a Houser longer than I have been a Marcellino.” That was that.

I realize now, that I was in no shape to make that decision at that time. It was a time of heartbreak and grief for me and I had so much sadness that I could not even think of changing my name. It seemed like it would invalidate my life as a wife/mother and family member to the Houser family. If I could go back and do it again, I’m still certain that I would say the same thing. That was not the time to make that decision. I’m glad I listened to my heart.

As I have said many times, I had a great life as Lisa Houser and changing my name was not going to make that any different. However, as the pain starts to fade and life moves on, things change.

I’m not really sure when it happened, but about a year ago, I started talking about it with Katie and a few others and yet, I still didn’t take the action. A big part of it was that it’s a lot of work to make all of the changes after you change your name. In addition, I assumed that an attorney and money would be involved so I put it on the back burner as a low priority.

When I was babysitting for Katie and had my couple of days with Greg, I realized that my heart was not beating like crazy. I didn’t have a pit in my stomach when I saw him. It didn’t diminish the love that will live with me forever. There was a moment that I just realized; I think I’m actually healed. Again, there was nothing in particular said or done that time, just a peace that came over me.

Once I got home and recovered from the week, I found myself thinking about the name change again. I didn’t feel as connected to the Houser name and no offense to my wonderful Houser family, but I do enjoy my Italian roots and Marcellino just fits better!

My next step was to find an attorney. In an effort to do so, I reached out to a couple of classmates to see if they could point me in the right direction…what type of attorney would I need? One of my friends gave me an attorney who could point me in the right direction and another classmate, who is an attorney, told me he could help me, but I could actually do it myself as it is really simple.

He was kind enough to forward the forms I needed and I completed them and headed down to the Justice Center to take the first steps. Every step of the way was smooth…traffic was a breeze, parking was almost handed to me, and there was literally no waiting in the office.

The clerk behind the counter took a liking to me (imagine that???) and we exchanged casual conversation and soon, she was swearing me in, processing the paperwork, and sending me on my way. That was that. She said it would take two weeks and it was exactly two weeks from the beginning to the end.

I walked out of the office and onto the sidewalk within 30 minutes of parking my car. Now, I knew that when this was final, I would have a lot of work to do so I started my list…Driver’s license, Social Security, Passport, Bank/Investments, Pension, yadda yadda yadda…It was important for me to get this taken care of prior to filing for all of those “senior” benefits!!

Some parts will be easier than others, but I’m ready. Just like I felt I was ready to make this name change, I’ve got my list of places I need to contact, and I’m already saying, Lisa Marcellino when someone asks my name.

I’m sure there will be other name change challenge stories along the way, so stay tuned! I’m up for the tasks!!

It feels great and it feels strange. I became a Houser at age 25 and now, at age 64, I’m a Marcellino again. I’m still the same Lisa, in most ways. I hold lots of wonderful memories as a Houser and I am still processing, but I’m still me. I hope you will easily change my name in your phones, but feel free to keep Houser as a reminder of who I was for about 38 years!

To my Houser family, I still feel you all in my heart. I do miss you all and know there will always be a place for each of you, especially as your families continue to grow. To my high school friends, who still call me Marcellino, this will be so easy for you!!! To my work friends, past and present, I know it will be an adjustment, but please update your records!! To the rest of my wonderful tribe, I want you to know I am still me!

Thanks to my friends who have supported me through this decision. I am especially grateful to my attorney friend (you know who you are!) for giving me the confidence to do it myself and as a result, I spent $105.00!!!

For those of you who may be thinking about playing matchmaker for me, be sure to warn the gentleman that I will not be changing my name again!!! Lol!! Love to all of you!