Oops…A Thursday Blog!

 

Happy Thursday Friends! No apologies, no regrets, just a simple “I forgot” to post my blog yesterday. Wednesday, day off, and packed full! Fortunately, I had something nearly ready to go, so I am posting today.

Recently, a pop-up on my computer produced an article titled, Five Reasons Why People Are Kind. This article led to a website that I soon bookmarked to become one of my favorites. The site is Positive News, as in Home - Positive News - Positive News

While so much of what we have been seeing in the last several weeks/months/year has been negative and/or sad, this is a site with positive vibes. I was intrigued for sure.

Now, I don’t want anyone thinking that I am all lollipops and rainbows, because we know I am not. If you have read this blog for any length of time, you definitely know that. I try to be positive, but sometimes, it just isn’t in me. Kindness isn’t always in me either, but this article about why people are kind, was lovely. So today, I’m sharing the top five reasons with my interpretation.

There are two bullet points in each item. The first is from the article, the second contains my thoughts.

 

Being kind is contagious

• Recognize that warm, fuzzy feeling you get when witnessing an act of kindness? Psychologists refer to this as ‘moral elevation’, and it helps explain why kindness is catching.
• This is is definitely true for me. I have been fortunate enough to have my McDonalds Drive-Thru order paid for by the car in front of me…more than once actually (no judging that I may go to McDonalds more than I should!) I instantly smile, and wave to the person. Then, without hesitation, when I am told about this kind act, I pay it forward with the person behind me. That sounds like it could be contagious, don’t you think?

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Kindness helps to create identity

•          Whether it’s giving up your seat on the bus for a stranger or inviting a struggling friend for dinner, being kind makes the giver feel good, as well as (hopefully) the beneficiary. Most of us want to think of ourselves as kind, so acting in that way reinforces our sense of identity, making us feel satisfied and proud of who we are.
•      I think we all would agree that we usually get more out of a kind act that the recipient does. However, I don’t like to think that I’m doing something to make myself feel good. I want it to be an automatic act. I will be working on this step!

Empathy is instinctive

•           Human brains are hardwired for empathy, because we associate those near to us – friends, partners, family members – so closely with our own selves, say psychologists at the University of Virginia. It stands to reason, then, that being kind to cheer someone up makes us feel good too. We’re putting something right, but also sharing in the relief that they feel.
•           I almost ended my comments with number three with “I want this to be instinctive, not something I do to make myself feel better.” Most of my friends have this personality trait…it’s in their DNA to be kind without a second thought. That’s why I am so fortunate. People that do not need affirmation for their good deeds or kindness, truly are instinctive with their empathy. I say “most of my friends” because there are a few that like to tell everyone what they did and thrive off of their good deeds. I know there are times when I just have to tell everyone that I paid for a Veteran’s dinner at Bob Evans or I sat with a lost child at Target. I never think of it as a way to be thanked or congratulated for being kind, but maybe I am. Maybe I should challenge people to do the same, or just quietly enjoy doing something nice/kind for someone else.

·         Kindness is attractive

•       In a 1980s study, 10,047 people were asked to rank preferences in a potential mate. Kindness ranked above physical attractiveness. Something to do with dodgy 80s haircuts? Perhaps, but more recently Dr Freya Harrison at the University of Nottingham drew a similar conclusion. “It might be a sign of good genes,” she says.
•       Well this is definitely something I can agree with. The most attractive people lose their appeal when they open their mouths and spew negative or hateful speech. Especially at this point in my life, kindness is definitely something attractive to me. I know some beautiful people, those who are just eye candy. Often, those people are not nice…being critical of others’ looks or lifestyles. Amazingly, all of my friends are BEAUTIFUL inside, which makes them BEAUTIFUL outside too! Maybe this needs to be added to the characteristics on the online dating sites….hmmmmmm.

Being kind creates connection

•         “Kindness is the social glue that connects individuals within a community,” say those at the organization Random Acts of Kindness. It’s more than a pleasing soundbite: being kind holds the key to all sorts of social connections. Volunteering or even simply donating some money to charity opens up a whole new circle of people to be connected to.
•         I know that the closer I am working with groups of people, the more I feel the kindness of others...or if I am to be honest, if there is a bad apple in the group, that can often overtake the kindness. Focusing on the kindness being contagious will be my motto. This year, Radom Act of Kindness Day is Wednesday, February 17! Consider this your notice! That day, I hope we can all intentionally share our random acts! I will be calling on you to do so.

Have a great day! It’s snowy and cold here and I’m working from home! Snow days! YAY!!!