I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!!

 

Oh boy!   2019 has brought winter in full force!   I attended a wedding on January 5, expecting it to be a wintery mess.   It was a beautiful day, nearly 50 degrees.   Then "all hell done broke loose!"

We’ve had two very wintery weekends…VERY wintery.   Lots of rain, turned to sleet/ice, then to snow…big flakes of snow.   Of course, it provided two power packed weekends for Kroger!   Yes…I was one of those people who shopped before the big storm, but really, not because I needed anything, just because I decided I was going to cook and prepare some meals for the freezer while I was snowed in. 

I purchased ingredients for a pot roast and a turkey breast that provided me with turkey for a few meals, and also for a good batch of turkey soup.    It was good to cook.   (*side note...who doesn't have enough food for a couple of snowed in days?  Even if you have to eat frozen pizza or microwave popcorn for breakfast or pancakes and pudding for dinner...note to self...ALWAYS have peanut butter, microwave popcorn, milk/vodka and toilet paper stock piled!) 

 Cooking for one is not fun…Partly because it’s just hard to prepare the individual serving but also because it’s a lot of work and mess for one person.   This is one area I have struggled with since I have been on my own.   At first, it was nice not to have to plan for meals and have something on the table every night.  I admit, I didn’t miss that.   

But then, I started to realize that bagged salads and turkey sandwiches were going to get old.   I started grabbing the $5 soup from Bob Evans…but again that was getting old.   Finally, one night, I made fajitas for one.   Well, that was a good idea in theory, and they tasted delicious, but it certainly reminded me why cooking for one was not fun.  It was lonely.  Downright lonely.   Sitting at the table, alone, saying out loud, "How was your day, Lisa?"  "It was great Lisa, thanks for asking."   Then smiling and saying, "Well this is fun!"   NOT!  It was not fun at all.

Since then, my cooking has been hit and miss.   I do enjoy using my crockpot and I know that is always good for a few meals so I try to use it every now and then, but I’m back to simple things…soups and sandwiches, eggs & toast, bagged salads, and happy hour treats when I meet friends.   I need to get better, but no pressure.

During this snow mess, I realized again that it’s not always easy to be alone.   As I was headed out to work one morning last week, I took a tumble on my sidewalk, just outside my door.   Yep, down like a ton of bricks.   My leg/foot went underneath me and I kept my head from hitting the concrete but the rest of my backside was on the ground.   Now, when I went down, my purse, lunch, and tote bag went flying…get a visual of that!   I let out a big “WHOOP!” as I went down, but no one heard or saw me as far as I know.

 

Once I realized that I was okay, I tried to get up…and it became apparent that it wasn’t going to be easy.  I could not get any traction…I mean it was black ice.   I stretched out one leg to get a foot into the grassy area covered with snow…to try and get some traction.   Stay with me now…very slowly, I rolled to get onto all fours…it wasn’t pretty I’m sure, but I was able to navigate a rise from the ground.   Then I had to gather up my belongings…my lunch box was over there, my purse was out there, and my tote bag was behind me.   I carefully picked up my items and headed back into my apartment.   

I had feared for my life, I had cracked myself up, and then, when I got back into the apartment…I had a total meltdown.  No one was there to see if I was okay.   No one even knew that I had fallen.   I really had no one to tell or no one to call.  So, I was forced to have my own pity party.   Seems like I am getting pretty good at that!  UGH!

 

Once I stopped shaking, I realized that I needed to change clothes and let work know that I was going to be a little late.   My work friends are the best.   All of them.   I am blessed.

Today, we have sub-zero temperatures, wind and a bit of snow.   All of the schools around me are closed…even University of Dayton and Ohio State are closed.   Even though Mt. Notre Dame was the last to close last night, as a staff person, I’m still expected to go in.   I'd like to think it's because we are "essential personnel" but I think it's just because they need someone to be around, just in case...   We can dress casually, we can arrive a little later, but we are expected to be there.    Based on my experience from the past week, I will be late.  I have no plans to rush, but rather to take my time, step carefully and get to work.

I remember that I don’t have a garage, I don’t have someone to scrape my windows, and I don’t have anyone to snuggle with on these very cold mornings.  Sometimes, I may get a little angry and bitter about this (one of the stages of grief, remember???).

I’m grateful for my remote start so I can get the car warmed up before stepping outside.   I wish I could stay home, in my PJs and binge watch some Netflix, but with my Gala a little over four weeks away, it’s probably better for me to go in.  

These subtle reminders about being alone can sting sometimes, but I remind myself that there are so many people in my life who are alone every day.   I’m no different than those dear people.   I just seem to fuss about it more. 

Whatever you are doing…please stay warm and safe!   Until next time…BRRRRRRRRR!