Legal Matters

I don’t know how many of you know this about me, but I am an advocate of being prepared for the end of life.   Not that I'm anxious to be a part of that, but it is a reality!

Some of this has come from seeing others caught up in difficult proceedings after the death of a loved one.   The unexpected tragic death, where there was no will, or no end of life instructions, have caused friends to tackle the system, costing money and time.  Sadly, it has caused them to lose time during their grieving process. 

Greg and I helped one of his cousins, who is alone, get her affairs in order as well.  She is older than us, never married, and although she doesn’t have a lot, she lives in a town with no relatives.   We helped her get a will and a living will and someday, when the time comes, Greg will be her power of attorney.   For her, she was grateful and relieved and it got me thinking about others who may need this help.

With my parents, we have always had the discussions because as the oldest, I was assigned the responsibilities that come along with the end of life.   Over the years, decisions have been made and minds have been changed and paperwork has been updated.   But as of today, I know that their end of life plans are in place and I feel confident that when the time does come, (which I hope will be a long time from now!), we’ll have things in order and be able to follow their wishes.

When Katie was born, Greg and I prepared our wills and increased our life insurance.   As she got older, we updated the information and stayed on top of things.   In addition, as she became a young adult, she became part of the discussion.  As an only child, we wanted to make sure she was okay with being responsible for our “estate!”  (using that word in quotes because we certainly didn’t have a lot to worry about!)

I remember when I traveled overseas for the first time with the Cincinnati Children’s Choir.   It was shortly after 9/11 – maybe a year or two.   I was scared to death.   The world was a crazy place and I worried that maybe something would happen.   Greg knew where the paperwork was (in the event of my death) but I showed Katie too, because I thought that they would both be so distraught, they would need to work together.   OMG!   I can’t believe that I did this!   Are you wondering if I need therapy?  Or are you wondering if I drove Katie to need therapy???    Don’t worry…we are both fine and we're both in therapy!!  LOL!!!

Fast forward to today, and being divorced, I knew that my will, living will, and power of attorney needed to be updated.  Greg would need to be removed as my beneficiary.   Katie is still an only child, so she is my choice for being responsible for following my wishes and taking care of my “estate!”  We have had conversations about my wishes so I know she understands.   

In addition, I have told her that if she feels the need for advice or support from Greg, I’m okay with that.   We have a history and he knows me pretty damn well.   She has my permission to talk to him when taking care of my business. I also have another trusted adult listed for her to consult.

I have known the importance of getting this information updated and yet, I had delayed making the changes.  I'm not sure why, but I think maybe it was because it was just one more step in this journey and with every step, there is a pain.  During the past couple of weeks, I have re-done all of this paperwork and this week, it will be finalized legally.  

When I go to Pittsburgh next, I’ll be taking copies for Katie and tell her to put the paperwork somewhere convenient but not to worry about getting it out for a very long time to come!   

Are you prepared?   I know it may sound morbid, but it is one of the best gifts you can give your family.   Don't leave it up to chance...make sure your paperwork is in order.   Once it is done...LIVE my friends!!  LIVE!   Life is a beautiful thing...don't miss any part of it!!

Lisa Houser, #grownasswoman saving families...One Will at a Time!!!  xoxoxo